in the mood

i feel like posting something, even though i don't have a purpose in writing. perhaps that corresponds to the fact that i feel like i don't have much a purpose in life right now. not in a depressed, self-pity way, but in the way that i only got dressed today at 3:30 p.m. to go out to lehi for one of my dance classes to have a photo shoot.

for lunch i ate re-heated cornbread that is so full of butter and sugar and not really much cornmeal that all the sweet goodness is starting to soak to the bottom, causing the cornbread to seem like it has a butter sauce akin to that of the delicious cake that my family loves called kentucky butter cake. if you have had the cake, you will know what i mean. if you have not had the cake, you should make it. (seriously, if you want the recipe, let me know.) I also ate some left-over broccoli and then an apple an hour or so later.

but why would you care what i ate for lunch today? especially because the meal consisted of only very quotidian and stodgy food items. (yes, i used thesaurus.com to find those words. they are a test for david and adrienne who made known that they are readers of the blog. they are word people, so i thought i'd put some nice words in here for them. if you are thinking you don't know what those words mean, that just proves how superior david and adrienne's vocabularies are to yours, for i would bet my remaining pan of cornbread that they know these words.)

you know, i think my life of late has seemed exceptionally purposeless because it has been insanely rainy in this desert where i live. that means that aaron is unmotivated to ride his bike to work, leaving me unmotivated to ride my bike anywhere at all. hence the coopedupedness. (that one i just made up.)

now on to more purposeful things. there are four things that have got me out of the cold basement this week. each of these things brings purpose and excitement to my life.

1. driving aaron to work when he doesn't want to ride his bike but i need to car later in the day. if aaron can be a purpose, then he is a pretty great purpose. he decided he wanted to ride his bike to work. well, his bike is a terribly old, chunky mountain bike that, until we were able to get a leftover brake handle put on it, had one broken brake handle. i don't know how he rides it, but at first he didn't care. it takes him 30 minutes to get to work on that thing, all along the way seeing dudes on road bikes zooming past him. i think he is starting to believe me that he would be much happier on a road bike.

2. going out to pull weeds. i have joined a community shares garden, though it is still unofficial because i haven't paid yet. this garden has a "garden intern" program. we pay $35, and then put in 5 hours of work in the garden per week, and then we get our produce shares when harvest time comes. if you are doing the math in your head, yes it would be cheaper to just buy a share and do no work. but going out to the garden gives me something to do, and i have been wanting to learn how to garden, so i thought this would be a good step. even though all i do is pull weeds and water, i like it, and i can't wait for the produce!

3. i went to my first ever, paid-for yoga class. i have done yoga plenty as a dancer, but i have never really gone to an official, public yoga class that was in no way associated to dance. it was pretty great to move my body and stretch, breathe deeply, and feel some sore muscles the next day. i am hoping to make yoga classes a bigger part of my summer, and future.

4. driving all the way out to lehi for a half-an-hour photo shoot for my little class. again, not really the most economical use of my time, but i love those girls i teach. they are so much fun and they will try any strange thing i throw at them. it is great to just go feel of young people's energy, especially after being inside the apartment all day.

on a completely different note, you know when you feel like something happened while you were sleeping but it is so vague and fuzzy you aren't quite sure what was real and what was a dream? last night, i was startled awake by aaron breathing loud, fast, and desperately. my reaction was to start shaking and hitting him. it took him a second, but he finally stopped and said "whoa....what happened?" at that point, i was already becoming unsure if i had really witnessed my husband being possessed by an evil spirit, or if i had been responding to a dream of my own. luckily, i don't have dreams in which i vigorously shake and slap aaron's face. after a moments pause he said that he thought maybe he was having a dream that he was being possessed. creepy.

so this was a very random, rambling blog post. i will stop rambling and continue reading "independent people" by halldor laxness. my comparative literature teacher last semester said it was his favorite book of all time, so i got it from the library.

oh that's another thing! i got a library membership. we live a whole block from the library.